Acknowledge your complicated feelings—like fear, guilt, uncertainty, and your deep desire to help. Remember, asking for support is never failing your parent. It helps ensure their long-term safety, happiness, and comfort, while also giving you needed peace of mind and confidence.
Find a peaceful, distraction-free moment when emotions aren’t running high. Avoid discussing care needs in the middle of arguments or crises. Gently let your parent know this is a loving conversation, not a confrontation, and that you want teamwork.
Use caring, supportive words. You might say:“I worry because I care about you so much.”“I want you to feel confident and stay healthy in your own home.” “Can we talk together about steps that might make daily life easier for both of us to manage?”
Gently reference what you’ve noticed, such as skipped medications or a recent fall. Explain friends found home help useful; use examples that show care, concern, and empathy rather than alarm.
Allow space for your parent’s worry, resistance, or doubts. Validate their concerns gently: “This is a big change.” “Your privacy and comfort are most important—I want you to feel at ease always.”
Invite your loved one to make choices. Compare options together—agency versus private care, schedules, and needs. Ask if they’d like to meet a caregiver and help design a plan they feel comfortable with.
Suggest a short-term trial or visit, making it easy to evaluate together. Present it as an experiment: “Would you be comfortable trying this for a week, just to see how it feels for you and us?”
Emphasize your ongoing support and flexibility. Assure them you’ll check in often, that plans can change, and you’ll make adjustments as needed. “If you ever feel unhappy, we’ll find another solution together.”
Santa Barbara
contact@agewell.care
(805) 900 - 0829
